A personal update

I haven't posted about my relationship for awhile. Most of you who have been following me for awhile, supporting me for awhile, know I have major issues with my DH. He is stingy, never talks to me, unsupportive, unemotional and any other "un" words would probably apply to him as well!

In recent times, we have had major improvements.

Firstly, he has finished studying so he has time for me and our DD. He has a lot of time for me. We actually do things together, and he wants too...he doesn't just do it to shut me up!

He also talks to me. We have real conversations. There are still somethings he will email me on, and i have told him that is something he should actually say to my face, not via email, and he acknowledges that I am right. We have things to talk about now too. He doesn't like to hear about my work, but he listens. He is eager to find out about my weight loss, now that I am so close to goal and he asks me how I went after weigh in. My last weigh in with the gain, he actually asked what I think I had done to deserve it. The one I just missed because I am a sook and didn't want 80 written on my card because I knew I had gained even more...DH went through the things I had done that week to put on weight....without being nasty.
He is actually paying attention.

He has on occassions told me how good I look, and physically he shows it too. He is attracted to me and wants me.

Support wise, he is actually going to join me for a fun run in Margaret River later this month...the 24th so just around the corner. He might not say he supports me, but this small action shows it is there.

Money....I feel still so controlled with the money. But even he has told me that I need to have access to our accounts online (i never had the passwords) because it is irresponsible that only ONE person has the control. Here I was thinking he wanted to control all ins and outs of money, and he did actually want me to be involved, but he didn't TALK! So now that he talks, we can resolve some stuff. He also said that he doesn't mind me spending money and he doesn't even mind what I spend my money, but I have to be aware of how much I am going through. Now please note, I do not spend a lot of money! But we have had birthdays/births/anniverary/royalshow etc to spend money on, and because I TAKE the money out, it is like I AM spending, when really it is for both of us. But he is right, I do need to know when the spending account is getting low. I do need to be involved in that side of things, and just to know that he isn't criticising my spending was good.

We are actually in a really good place. Not perfect. We will still need to work at our relationship, but I think all relationships need work. He does struggle with showing emotion and talking about his feelings, and it is something we will keep working at. But we are in a good place. We are not getting divorced. I don't want to get divorced anymore, and I am not leaving him.

in fact, we are in such a good place, we are looking at selling our house and building a brand new one. This has been great for us too, as we have been driving together looking at land, talking about it, going through display homes and liking and disliking the same things for the exact same reasons. We are quite passionate about the building process and our wants are exactly the same! We have even discussed, in the process of picking out our needs for the house and how many bedrooms, the likelihood of another child. Now I have always just wanted one. He wants two. He was really upset that I didn't want more (see what can come out of a conversation!). But now I am more open to having another child, but when DD is at school full time. So now we have talked about children, houses and it would take a year to build, a year to get settled and then in that time maybe try for another child, if all is still going well.

So huge changes in the relationship. I am happy in my relationship. I am in love with my husband again. And I know he loves me. I am still entitled to bitch about him whenever I feel like having a bitch though! But for now, we are happy and all is strong! :)